Little Ashes (with Robert Pattinson)
I was raised in a home where if you didn’t have something nice to say about someone/thing then don’t say anything at all. If I were to heed to my upbringing you would have nothing to read as far as LITTLE ASHES is concerned. However, as it is my great honor to watch movies good and bad (really bad in this case) and share the parts where actors, directors, cinematographers, etc got it right or wrong, I hope my parents will forgive the non-nice words I’m about to say about this film.
LITTLE ASHES is the movie somewhat based on the college lives of poet Frederico Garcia Lorca (Javier Beltrán), artist Salvidor Dalí (Robert Pattinson) and filmmaker Luis Buñuel (Matthew McNulty) set in 1922 Madrid, Spain. I had hopes for this picture having nothing but love for (most) Spanish speaking films. As I heard the opening lines of the movie in English with Spanish accents, images of the movie FRIDA danced through my head (FRIDA was in English with Mexican accents). This movie doesn’t hold a candle to that masterpiece. I believe that if AirBud did a Spanish film it would be better than this. The first 22 minutes were the most boring minutes of my life. After those first 22 minutes passed I was finished with boredom and became angry for having continued to watch this horrible, choppy, mess of a movie. It was like watching a poorly scripted, poorly acted high school play. I want my hour and 52 minutes back. The flashbacks are irrelevant with ridiculous voiceovers that add no substance to the film. As the film progresses confusion sets in: are we supposed to follow Dalí as the lead character? Or Lorca? Where is the chemistry between Dalí and Lorca? I cannot get behind their storyline because everything feels forced. Who is this film about? Dalí’s evolution from outsider to eccentric artist? Lorca’s love for Dalí and his political involvement? Nothing is consistent in this film except for how terrible it is.
Having only seen Pattinson in HARRY POTTER AND THE GOBLET OF FIRE I didn’t know what to expect from him as an actor taking on the role of Dalí in this biopic. He does a terrible job of keeping with the English/Spanish accent and each monologue he gives makes me cringe. I’ll go ahead and say it: Robert Pattinson is awful in this film. His Dali mustaches are laughable and distracting. Does he think that to be eccentric he must have exaggerated eyes? I suppose die-hard Pattinson fans will appreciate one mini-montage where you see him very nearly nude. It served no purpose. Which I have said before in this review but it deserves repeating. Each choice made by actors, or the director seemed to serve no purpose and did not propel the film to the next scene. The only nice things I can think to comment on are: a few scenes were beautifully shot and Beltrán did a so-so job as the anguished poet. Also, there were several scenes where I laughed out loud, but I don’t think that was the intention of the film.
Overall I was hugely disappointed in every part of this movie. Save your time and skip this Pattinson flick.