Piranha 3DD Blu-ray Review
A couple of years ago a cheesy horror-esque movie with some fairly well-known actors came out in the form of PIRANHA (or PIRANHA 3D if you saw it in theaters). The film was fun but mediocre, however, audiences knew there were eventual sequels to be made to profit off the growing popularity of the 3D technology. So now we’re here in 2012 with the first of what could be multiple sequels called PIRANHA 3DD which gives us the clever and crass tagline of “Twice the Terror. Double the DD’s”. For young teenage boys that later part will sadly not disappoint, as for the former line, well I’m a self-proclaimed wimp when it comes to horror films and PIRANHA 3DD had me laughing harder than episodes of some of my favorite television shows.
After the tragic events at Lake Victoria, things have settled down and the surrounding areas can take solace knowing that the pre-historic piranha problem was a fluke and thing to put behind them. Sadly, the little blood-thirsty fish somehow managed to lay eggs in a lake that happens to be right next to a waterpark that is scheduled to open in just a few days. What kinds of horror will the hordes of swimmers encounter if somehow the piranhas find their way up the pipes into the kiddie pool?
If you are going into PIRANHA 3DD with any hopes of a logical story or Oscar worthy acting then you are just silly. This film has cheesy lines, sleazy, one-note characters and a plot that is so predictable it’s crazy, however, the acting wasn’t nearly as bad as you would think. That could be because PIRANHA 3DD has some veteran actors like David Koechner, Katrina Bowden, Ving Rhames, Christopher Lloyd and the best lifeguard ever, David Hasselhoff. What was surprising was that some of the relative newcomers like Danielle Panabaker, Matt Bush and Chris Zylka (THE AMAZING SPIDER-MAN) didn’t totally stink up the screen, or maybe that’s because the expectations were so low.
What was most shocking about PIRANHA 3DD was that it was way less gory and bloody than its predecessor. One would have thought that letting hundreds of piranhas loose inside multiple pools with waterslides would have opened up a plethora of possibilities for gruesome shots, however, the actual waterpark attack was pretty anticlimactic. It seemed like the writers just gave up and crossed their fingers that bloody body parts floating to the bottom of the pool would be sufficient enough for the audience. Or perhaps it wasn’t the writers fault, but the studios for only giving the film an 83 minute runtime. How can you possibly have a satisfying bloodbath in under 90 minutes?
So should you see PIRANHA 3DD? Well, if it was on late at night and you had a bout of insomnia then I would definitely say give it a go. It’s not one I would recommend you rushing out to rent or buy, especially in 3D because the 3D transfer was pretty awful. If you are intent on seeing little fishies gobble up humans then watch PIRANHA or better yet just stick JAWS in your Blu-ray player.
Video: I watched the 3D version of the film and it had some serious glitches whether it be from the film or the projector I’m not sure. If I were to watch this film again I’d just stick with the 2D version.
Audio: The audio was fine and there was nothing awful nor spectacular.
Commentary with Director John Gulager, Producer Joel Soisson and Co-writer Marcus Dunstan: This was fairly entertaining and if you just can’t get enough of the franchise then I would recommend watching it. It after all only 83 minutes long.
Deleted Scenes (2:33): Three scenes that were mediocre.
The Story Behind the DD (7:51): This is basically just a montage of cast and crew interviews about the film that covers various topics.
The Hofftastic World of David Hasselhoff (2:08): A short bit about the Hoff talking about his life and working on the film.
Busey’s Bloopers (2:03): This is just a couple of minutes of Gary Busey rambling away, though I’m not sure how he got his own featurette considering he was in the film less than five minutes.
Wet and Wild with David Koechner (1:36): A short bit with the actor talking about nudity and violence in films.
“A Lesson with John McEnroe” A Dimension Short Film (3:53): I have no idea why a short film about a tennis player coaching a kid on the sport belongs on the special features for a film about piranhas, but your guess is as good as mine.