Words can be very hurtful, but for some all it takes is a simple abbreviation to send a terrifying chill straight to their bones. If you happen to be a criminal, then the letters “FBI” or “DEA” are probably your least favorite in the alphabet. For a pro athlete, the trio of “A,” “C,” and “L” are never followed by good news. And if movies is your business . . . actor, director and producer alike knows something has gone fatefully wrong when the studio brands the project as DTV (Direct to Video).
Direct-to-video releases have been a mainstay of the film industry ever since the home video market exploded in the 1980’s. At first, it was a way for smaller films with slim budgets to get in front of an actual audience bigger than the casts’ and crews’ living rooms. But then it evolved, or devolved, into the land of misfit flicks. The usual suspects are raunchy comedies whose only goal is to gratuitously show naked women, unintentionally funny horror films, and of course the “king of the ring,” explosion and bad dialogue-filled action goulash flavored by an athlete/wrestler of the month.
HIJACKED is former MMA champion Randy Couture’s addition to Hollywood’s rogue’s gallery. The film is poignantly named, as “hijacked” is exactly what happens to the time spent watching this film. Couture plays Paul Ross, a CIA operative tracking an international terrorist crime syndicate whose goal is to crush the global economy, blah, blah, blah . . . you can’t believe this is all RedBox had left on a Tuesday night!
The action, which is the only bait a film like this even has at its disposal, is boring. The fighting maneuvers have all been performed in other films ad nauseam, and with a higher quality of execution. Never for a moment is the plot interesting or original and the only relief is when you get a few seconds of Vinny Jones (Ballard) so you can reminisce about SNATCH and EUROTRIP.
The characters in HIJACKED are less developed than the Congo, including a set of villains that at some point should have yelled, “And we would’ve gotten away with it too if it wasn’t for that jacked-up agent and his cauliflower ears.” Also not contributing to a future member of the Criterion Collection is a script crammed with dialogue that’s not even worthy of a community college night class or worse, a hit show on ABC Family Channel.
And speaking of television, what may be the most distracting aspect of the film is the production value, which teeters between a show on Fox like “24” or “Prison Break,” and a BBC series like “Dr. Who,” sans the great writing and acting. From the opening scene, a viewer is under no inkling of an impression that he or she is watching a bona fide red carpet film, more like a bad summer replacement pilot.
But other than all that, it’s still completely horrible. The most fascinating thing about HIJACKED is that films like this keep getting the “green light.” Personally, I blame Netflix.
Video: 1080p, Aspect Ratio (1.78:1): The video quality is exactly that, video quality. It looks like something you could’ve shot with a $300-$400 camera off Ebay. Sure it’s HD, but more like a home movie or soap opera quality.
Audio: Dolby TrueHD 5.1 Audio Mix: The audio was all over the place in this film in terms of volume. Action scenes would turn the dial up to 10 and then jolt down to 4 or 5 for dialogue.
No Special Features Included – Actually that’s not accurate, the greatest special feature this disc bestows upon any unfortunate viewer is not having to sit through a moment more of material regarding this film.
